Hunchback bell ringer
Someone posted a request for the third pun for this joke. I heard it differently than was posted; don't know how to integrate the third line with the way it was told, so I'm posting the whole thing as I heard it (well, more or less....) A man advertises a job to ring the bell in his tower. The only job applicant is a hunchback with no arms. Tower owner: "How can you do the job? You can't pull the rope!" Hunchback: "I have a plan - but we have to go to the top of the tower, where the bell is." .. So they climb all those stairs to the top of the tower. Tower owner: "Ok, show me your plan." The hunchback runs and jumps at the bell, striking it with his head. Sure enough, he rings the bell. Tower owner: "That's quite a plan, but you'll have to make the bell ring a lot louder for everyone in town to hear it." The hunchback goes to the farthest corner of the tower, and runs as fast as he can toward the bell. When he jumps up and hits it with his head, the bell rings clear and loud. Unfortunately, the hunchback hit the bell so hard he's a little groggy. He staggers around a bit, and falls out a window to the street below. As the tower owner is going down all those stairs, a crowd gathers around the hunchback's mangled body lying in the street. One passerby: "Who is this guy?" Passerby's friend: "Dunno, but his face rings a bell." Another passerby: "If he's not the hunchback from across town, he's a dead ringer for him." Just about this time the tower owner arrives on the street. He takes a close enough look to confirm the man is dead, and comments: I had a hunchback there nothing good would come of this job interview."